Why I Am Not Grateful
What are the reasons that we don’t express our gratitude?
Verse of the Day
‘And let the peace that comes from Christ rule in your hearts. For as members of one body you are called to live in peace. And always be thankful.’
Today’s Devotional
We are given many instructions in the Bible for how we should behave. I encourage you to read all of Colossians 3 today. There are many valuable instructions listed. Of all of the instructions given in that chapter, gratitude seems to be an afterthought. It’s just thrown in there toward the end. That makes me wonder.
Maybe gratitude was supposed to be a given for followers of Jesus. Maybe speaking our thanks to God and to each other is much easier than the other instructions. It is certainly easier, in my humble opinion, than seeking and promoting peace. It is easier than loving other humans unconditionally.
My husband and I were watching a show on Netflix called Longmire. It is about a sheriff in Wyoming who is a man of few words. After watching several episodes (and because I am writing about gratitude), I keep noticing situations when someone helped him and he never says “Thank you”.
This makes me wonder why it is difficult for some people to express gratitude. I can think of a few reasons:
- Pride: I don’t need you – so anything you do for me is not needed, therefore I am not grateful.
- Being Unaware: I am so self focused that I don’t even notice when you do something for me for which I should be grateful.
- Appearance: If I express gratitude to you, it might make me look weak. (This also falls in the pride category.)
- Cynicism: I believe you have ulterior motives for anything you are doing for me, and thanking you will only fuel the fire.
- Envy: If I had the easy life you do, I could go around helping people too. I am not grateful for you because I want what you have.
- Assuming: You know that I am grateful for you, so I don’t need to say anything.
- Insecurity: If I were to actually say “thank you” it might be awkward. Or you might think that I am incompetent to do those things for myself.
- Embarrassment: You did something really nice for me, and I haven’t done anything for you. If I thank you, my lack will be more noticeable.
- Repetition: You’ve done this for me before, and I said “thank you” last time. No need to say it again.
At one time or another, I have experienced all of the above reasons for not being grateful. As far as my gratitude to God, I believe my reasons for not expressing my thanks would be pride, being unaware, assuming, and repetition.
Here’s the thing: we have to practice anything to be good at it. The same holds true for expressing gratitude, both to God and to other humans. A couple of years ago, I started on a quest to become a person of gratitude. But it is not always easy. Especially when things are not going my way. But for some reason, when I force myself to make a list of things I am thankful for, either mentally or on paper, something inside me shifts. There have been times when I am in the middle of making myself be grateful when the rest of my brain is having a tantrum that would rival any toddler. I still need lots of practice.
We should pay attention to anything written in the Bible. We should pay REALLY CLOSE attention to the things in the Bible that are repeated multiple times. We are told many, many times in the Bible to be grateful, to give thanks. Maybe we just need more practice. Maybe we need to honestly examine why we are not more grateful. Either way, today is a great day to make a decision to practice always being thankful.
Today’s Gratitude Challenge: Who is a person in your family that you are grateful for? It could be someone who lives in your home currently, or someone in your extended family.
“How wonderful and pleasant it is when brothers live together in harmony!” (Psalms 133:1)
Let’s replace the word “brothers” in this verse with “families”. How wonderful and pleasant it is when families live together in harmony. And yes, I understand that some families are difficult. But there must be one person in your family for whom you are grateful. Write down who it is, why you are grateful for this person, and thank God for him or her.
Journal Prompts
Answer only the questions that seem relevant to you today.
Is gratitude easy for you?
Which of the reasons for not being grateful can you identify for yourself?
What keeps you from being more grateful to God each day?
How can you make a decision and declaration to practice being thankful in all circumstances?
What family member are you grateful for and why? Thank God for the presence of this person in your life.