Speaking Truth in Love
Do you consider yourself to be spiritually mature?
Verse of the Day
‘Instead, we will speak the truth in love, growing in every way more and more like Christ, who is the head of his body, the church.’
Today’s Devotional
How do you feel when someone is harsh with you? Even if everything that this person said was true? I immediately get defensive. I’m sure I don’t hear the truth of the words very well because I am hiding behind the wall I’ve thrown up.
In John 4, Jesus has a conversation with a Samaritan woman. In that conversation, Jesus pointed out to her that her idea of worship was wrong, and that her relational choices were questionable. But he did all of that with such love that she was able to hear every word the He said. The truth He spoke to her in love changed her life.
Looking at today’s verse, where we are called to speak the truth in love, it comes from a section of Ephesians that the New Living Translation calls “Unity in the Body”. Have you ever been a part of a group where there was division, disagreements, and fighting? I have. It’s not pleasant. The group I am thinking of ended up splitting into two separate groups. All because of some disagreements and the inability to speak the truth in love.
We, as Christians, are called to be a unified body. We are not instructed that we should agree on everything. When our disagreements threaten our unity, then it’s time to speak truth in love. When I am believing the lies of the devil or the world, which skews my thoughts and perceptions, I pray that God will send someone to speak loving truth to me. And I pray that I will listen.
If we look at the other “suggestions” for unity from this section of Scripture, we see lots of great advice on how to deal with each other:
- Live a life worthy of your calling
- Be humble
- Be gentle
- Be patient with each other
- Make allowance for each other’s faults
- Keep yourself united in the Spirit
- Bind with other believers in peace
- Do not be immature
- Do not be swayed by clever, false teaching
When I look at that list, I see WAY more instructions for me personally that I do about how to deal with others. So maybe how we treat people starts with our own personal spiritual journey. I cannot decide to just be a person who only speaks truth in love without doing some work on myself and my spiritual maturity first.
In any group of people, there will always be different perspectives, opinions, backgrounds, and preferences. That’s actually a really good thing. (I refer you to 1 Corinthians 12, where Paul discusses One Body with many different parts.) But amidst the diversity, sometimes hard conversations need to be had. We need to have the ability to gently and lovingly correct one another. We need to have the wisdom and maturity to see when and how those conversations need to happen. That’s where the Holy Spirit comes in, and this requires each of us to listen to the leading of the Spirit.
But I also need to be willing to keep my mouth shut if the “correction” is done in order to get you to agree with me, or see things from my perspective, in any non-central issue. We need to learn to be accepting of our differences. When my daughter was growing up, I would tell her that this world would be a very boring place if we were all exactly alike.
Regardless of the topic of conversation, telling someone the truth gives us ZERO license for harshness, criticism, sarcasm, or any kind of tone where the listener feels attacked. It’s a waste of our time to speak to each other in that way, the listener simply cannot receive the desired message if they feel attacked. So it’s really in our best interest to learn to communicate with love.
Learning to be a loving truth speaker must be a learned art. May we all be eager students of the Spirit to learn the most loving way we can share the truth.
Journal Prompts
Answer only the questions that seem relevant to you today.
How does harshness affect you?
Which items from the list above do you need the most work on?
How can you practice speaking the truth in love today?
How can you be an eager student of the Holy Spirit?
About what do you need to commit to keep your mouth closed?